Mother’s Day is the best commemorative day, and the worst.
“There he goes again,” you think. “Contradicting himself.” Allow me to explain.
The Good
I think it is great that we have a day to remember our mums, and all that they’ve done for us, and all that we owe them.
It’s great that we have this annual reminder to acknowledge the person who is arguably the most important person in our lives. And to double down on our efforts to make her happy.
The Bad
But it’s horrible if, like in many people’s cases, it’s the ONLY reminder. In that case, Mother’s Day is just the worst.
You know the type I’m talking about.
They are the ones who live their lives as if mum does not exist. They live out their busy lives, making a name for themselves in the world, jet setting, wheeling and dealing, and basically climbing the golden ladder. As for the poor Aged P, she must content with a life of solitude in an old-aged home somewhere.
And then, come Mother’s Day or a birthday, the lonely matriarch is sent a commemorative, gift and a card. And if she’s truly lucky, she might even be blessed with a visit from her successful and high profile offspring.
The Ugly
And then there are the worst type: those who are outright mean to their mums.
I had a horrible experience once in a restaurant where a mum told her teenager to put her phone away and to spend time with the family, only to be verbally abused by the brat. I was horrified.
The mum saw me looking, and I could see the hurt and embarrassment in her eyes. I really didn’t know what to do at that point. I just looked back down at my meal.
Breeding monsters
Do we live in a society that shuns or encourages that kind of behaviour? Are our kids taught to love and respect their parents no matter what, or are they taught to “deconstruct” and “rethink” such traditional relationships?
I think if one had to look at today’s entertainment industry, the answer will be quite evident. From movies to series to music, we celebrate the rebels, those who shun traditional values live life by their own rules.
We are taught that traditional values, relationships and social hierarchies are an anachronism, something that is from the stone ages.
I understand that many of the above have been problematic any many cases, but I ask you: why go to extremes? Why do we discard EVERYTHING when SOME things are problematic?
And yet we complain about our iPhones: one thing wrong, and you have to chuck them in the bin because they are unrepairable.
The truth of the matter is this: respect breeds respect. And mutual respect breeds unity and coherence in communities. And communities that are united and close-knit, have “social capital” and hence they tend to thrive.
Back to mum.
Inspiration
My mum is my inspiration, and with good reason: she is one of the toughest people I know. Here’s an example: when my dad passed away, my brothers and I offered to take care of all her financial needs.
What did she do instead? She asked us to keep our money, and she started her own business, at 64.
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